Humor

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Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Aug 09, 2024  | 

You stumble into your favorite Starbucks half-awake as you do every morning and WHAM! There's Elvis standing at the end of the counter — fringed shirt, sequined guitar strap and all. You do a quick draw from your iPhone holster while The King patiently waits for his venti peanut butter banana flat white with an extra three pumps of funnel cake syrup, but — damn! — the battery is dead. What do you do? You're missing your chance to join the annals of consumer photojournalism and a shot at certain Instagram history. That's about a zillion Likes being blown to tarnation.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Mar 31, 2024  |  First Published: Apr 01, 2024  | 

Less than one month after announcing their plans to acquire US cinema camera manufacturer RED.com, LLC, Nikon stunned the photographic industry by declaring that they've consummated the acquisition of Konica-Minolta, a leading manufacturer of business technology and office products.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Sep 01, 2023  | 

Our local supermarket has Halloween candy and scary witches on display, so that can mean only one thing in New Jersey—school is about to open. Annually, each and every elementary school student produces, on average, 331* metric tons of precious artwork; add another 11* tons if they attend summer camp. Some of the items are small enough to fit on the refrigerator door, and all of them are worth keeping forever. Short of renting offsite storage space to house and curate their youngsters' souvenirs of academia, how do sentimental parents cope?

[ *Author's estimate based on absolutely nothing. ]

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Aug 11, 2023  | 

Ignore the advice from gilded-fork professionals whose work appears in Bon Appétit. What do they know outside their successful careers? They pursue perfection, whereas most of us just want a clear snapshot of our meal. If you're with me, tune into the New Jersey Diner edition of food photography tips.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Dec 18, 2022  | 

‘Twas the night before Christmas
And I was delirious:
I could not find the battery
for my Fujifilm mirrorless.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Oct 23, 2022  | 

Not really, of course. But you can turn your scary Halloween decorations into thriller movie masterpieces using the Neural filters in Photoshop and a little imagination. Besides, we all know there’s no such thing as a Zombie. Right?

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Sep 12, 2022  | 

Who doesn’t love soup? But did you know there is an established link between your favorite soup and the types of pictures you should creatively pursue? Is your favorite on this list?

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Apr 01, 2022  | 

We started looking for DIY skins for cameras and lenses and discovered a literal treasure trove of sticky things that are camera-related, at least remotely. We limited our search to AliExpress, an online merchant with whom we have had sporadic success. We think you’ll like some or all of them, so we’re sharing our findings here.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Feb 18, 2022  | 

You remember last time, our insipid camera guru WTF (Where’s The Flash?) answered questions from Flat Mooners, forlorn lovers, indecisive Olympic skater Stylana Fenz and others. Well, WTF is back with another bagful of perplexing questions. Let’s dig right in.

Henry Anderson  |  Dec 15, 2021  | 

Here's a humorous, satirical, and surprisingly helpful tutorial that offers you bad photography advice…on purpose. In the video below, pro photographer Mark Denney flips his regular tips and tricks on their head to share the worst things you can do if you're shooting landscapes.

Henry Anderson  |  Nov 19, 2021  | 

Los Angeles-based photographer Michael Sasser is who we often turn to for great boudoir photography tutorials but now he's back with something a bit more humorous. 

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Oct 15, 2021  | 

The full name in the product listing is X6 Portable Ultra Mini HD High Denifition [sic] Digital Camera Mini DV Support 32GB TF Card with Mic USB Flash Drive for Camera. It costs less than $11

Henry Anderson  |  Sep 14, 2021  | 

Nothing is worse for a portrait than a subject who looks irritated or angry when they're supposed to be relaxed. Unless that's the angle you're going for, and even then, you still need your model to look engaged in a photo. Otherwise, the image will look awkward.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Sep 10, 2021  | 

Does your sleep posture predict your photographic ability?  As an indicator of your creative potential, it’s as valid as Tarot cards, tea leaves and oomancy. We’ve analyzed the top four sleeping poses and invented your personal photographic horoscope.

Oomancy is a lost art. It’s the prediction of future events based on the shape egg whites take while being cooked. I’m not nearly clever enough to make crap like this up; it really is a thing. If you believe in the potential power of a morphed omelet, maybe you’ll fall for the rest of this story.

Jon Sienkiewicz  |  Aug 05, 2021  | 

The Madame Curie Electron Camera Bag, one of several included in this review, glows in the dark. After using it for two weeks, I now glow in the dark, too. Read about this bag and several other products, including my favorite: the Julius Caesar Photographers Toga.

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